The Rules Revisited I've dated countless women and it has always amazed me how little they know about men. If nothing else, this blog is an outlet for voicing my astonishment at the typical female's ignorance of the male mindset. At most, it is a reliable source of advice for women who want to improve their chances with the opposite sex. The topic is avoided because women do not realize how controllable their appearance is.
August 16, DJ Dick Hennessy with Miss Beautiful VaginaJordan I was dressed modestly in a knee-length black dress, white Converse, and a denim jacket, and felt as comfortable as any stripper can when behaving as a civilian at a strip club event. Although Portland is home to about 45 strip clubs, its Beauty notes entertainment district only has five, but on this Thursday evening, Club Rouge was already thumping with activity.
I proudly displayed my black and pink VIP pass to the door attendant, feeling like vaginal royalty. About three dozen women of various ethnicities and body types strutted and mingled.
The judging panel was comprised of local Portland celebrities and industry folks: I was the only judge with an actual vagina. Scoring was based Beauty notes three categories: Once the contest began, the next four hours were a blur of vaginas and stilettos.
The judges passed magnifying glasses between ourselves, some equipped with flashlights. Dull razors and lack of exfoliation are enemies to a flawless bikini zone.
Some dancers were masters of the pole, some moved lithely along the floor, and a couple relied on humping the male portion of the panel and fingering themselves. Most of the vaginas had nary a landing strip or patch of pubic hair. One familiar stripper had the creativity to plan a sacrilegious performance set, complete with a handmade crucifix that had a Barbie affixed to it.
When one particular contestant approached, my brain cried out in protest, but I maintained my smile. I was suddenly wishing I had somewhere to escape.
A vagina event would be a prime opportunity to wash yourself, but she had a face like Mr. Burns, framed by long brown hair, and a proud FUPA. If a lady takes care of her feet, she takes care of everything else.
I was waiting for it to snarl. I was more displeased than surprised when she displayed to us a vibrator and frantically began fucking herself with it. When the plastic green device popped suddenly from her vagina, Shawna the drag queen reacted by attempting to catch it.
Yet as the vibe touched her fingertips, the chagrin showed on her face and she held her hands to her sides, in an effort to shake them off, and then wiped them on her chair, still grimacing. Fish Face Guy was still standing behind us, licking his lips.
Mostly due to the fact that she was 18 and had a beautiful vagina, and that the judges were predominantly male. One lovely competitor looked familiar to me. Later when I asked, she said that we had indeed worked together before. Hopefully the fact that she had earned a 10 on my scorecard slightly made up for that past offense.
The scores were tabulated and the winner, Miss Jordan from Club Heat was announced. The quietly confident young lady smiled big and stood proudly as her trophy, nearly 5 feet tall, was placed beside her.You want beauty tips to help you find that perfect foundation, that fragrance that hits all the right notes.
Now it's all in one place—think helpful resources, quizzes and more. We'll be your BFF when it comes to achieving your best look yet!
Get tangled in vanilla or revel in the clean notes of. All photos courtesy Dick Hennessy Productions/Hypnox. ATTN: NSFW PHOTOS AFTER THE JUMP.
At 10 p.m. last Thursday, I sat myself in the judges’ row at Club Rouge in downtown Portland for the fifth annual Vagina Beauty regardbouddhiste.com were six judges, two poles, 22 competitors and 23 vaginas.
Sarah Vine's Beauty Notes: Life-changing finds. January 24th / Sarah Vine / 0 comment This week Sarah Vine has found a contender for London's best facial, a Ferrari of a hair dryer and a skincare range that all teenage girls need to know about.
The mission of Operation Beautiful is to post anonymous notes in public places for other people to find. The point is that WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL.
It’s T-minus 1 day until Valentine’s Day, the ‘day for love’ as we know it. Whether you’re heading out with bae for date night, hanging with the girls for a GNO, or chilling at home solo, we all . From a general summary to chapter summaries to explanations of famous quotes, the SparkNotes The Iliad Study Guide has everything you need to ace quizzes, tests, and essays.